Posts Tagged ‘Lessons Learned’
Happy, Lonely, Sad, Angry
Happy – when you can bring your whole self to everything you do.
Lonely – when you’re with people all day but can’t be truthful with them.
Sad – when you see what could be but never will.
Angry – when someone is less than truthful.
Happy – when people you care about are treated well.
Lonely – when you’re misunderstood.
Sad – when you realize a person’s lack of truthfulness will make them lonely.
Angry – when you take things personally that aren’t personal.
Happy – when an old friend visits.
Lonely – when there’s no trust.
Sad – when you see someone break trust and you know that will bring them loneliness.
Angry – when you know someone should know better.
Happy – when someone asks you for help.
Lonely – when you know you can help but they don’t ask.
Sad – when someone is set up for failure and there’s no way to help them.
Angry – when that someone is a good friend.
Happy – when you have your health.
Happy – when you have fun with friends.
Happy – when you spend time outside.
Happy – when you walk your dogs.
Happy – when your kids and your partner love you.
Whether you’re happy, lonely, sad, or angry, this too shall pass.
Image credit – Tambako the Jaguar.
Top Blog Posts of 2024
Here are the top four blog posts from 2024 with a little summary of each.
It’s not the work, it’s the people. By far the most popular post. Here are some important words from the post: hard work, share, struggle, elbow-to-elbow, fear, crew, extra load, friend, through the wringer, smile, sad, care, easier. And I finished with a challenge.
For the most important people, take a minute and write down your shared experiences and what they mean to you. What would it mean to them if you shared your thoughts and feelings? Why not take a minute and find out? Wouldn’t work be more energizing and fun? If you agree, why not do it? What’s in the way? What’s stopping you?
Why not push through the discomfort and take things to the next level?
Projects, Products, People, and Problems. The post was written within the tight context of product development systems, but I think the tight one-liners have broader applicability. Here are a few of may favorites.
- To get more projects done, do fewer of them.
- Stop starting and start finishing.
- People grow when you create the conditions for their growth.
- When in doubt, help people.
- Trust is all-powerful.
- Whatever business you’re in, you’re in the people business.
Pro Tips for New Product Development Projects. This one was one was narrow and deep. Here are the main themes:
- Effectiveness is more important than efficiency, but we behave otherwise.
- Everyone has too many projects and that’s why they take so long.
- Resources – too highly utilized.
- Novelty – too much of a good thing isn’t wonderful.
I’m thankful! I wrote this for the Thanksgiving holiday. There were four themes: family, health, time, and telling people about your thankfulness. Family – straightforward. Health – appreciating our remaining health because we recognize it flowing away. This one is a little backward, but the Stoics know. And so does Buddha. Time – appreciation of our time, especially when others pull on us. Telling people about our thankfulness – this a great way to multiply the impact of our thankfulness.
Happy New Year and thanks for reading, Mike
Image credit — Anna Sofia Guerreirinho
What do you choose to be?
Be bold – the alternative is boring.
Be the first to forgive – it’s like forgiving twice.
Be yourself – you’re the best at that.
Be afraid – and do it anyway.
Be effective – and to hell with efficiency.
Be happy – if that’s what’s inside.
Be authentic – it’s invigorating.
Be energetic – it’s contagious.
Be a listener – that’s where learning comes from.
Be on time – it says you care.
Be early if you can’t be on time – but just a little.
Be courageous – but sparingly.
Be kind – people remember.
Be truthful – that’s how trust is built.
Be a learner – by learning to listen.
Be sad – if that’s what’s inside.
Be a friend – it’s good for them and better for you.
Be nobody – it’s better for everybody, even you.
Image credit — Irene Steeves
What It Means To Stand Tall
People try to diminish when they’re threatened.
People are threatened when they think you’re more capable than they are.
When they think less of themselves, they see you as more capable.
There you have it.
When someone doesn’t do what they say and you bring it up to them, there are two general responses. If they forget, they tell you and apologize. If they don’t have a good reason, they respond defensively.
When someone responds defensively, it means they know what they did.
They respond defensively when they know what they did and don’t like what it says about them.
Defensiveness is an admission of guilt.
Defensiveness is an acknowledgment that the ego was bruised.
Defensiveness is a declaration self-worth is insufficient.
People can either stand down or turn it up when defensiveness is called by name.
When people stand down, they demonstrate they have what it takes to own their behavior.
When they turn it up, they don’t.
When people turn their defensiveness into aggressiveness, they’re unwilling to own their behavior because doing so violates their self-image. And that’s why they’re willing to blame you for their behavior.
When you tell someone they didn’t do what they said and they acknowledge their behavior, praise them. Tell them they displayed courage. Thank them.
When you call someone on their defensiveness and they own their behavior, compliment them for their truthfulness. Tell them their truthfulness is a compliment to you. Tell them their truthfulness means you are important to them.
When you call someone on their defensiveness and they respond aggressively, stand tall. Recognize they are threatened and stand tall. Recognize they don’t like what they did and they don’t have what it takes (in the moment) to own their behavior. And stand tall. When they try to blame you, tell them you did nothing wrong. Tell them it’s not okay to try to blame you for their behavior. And stand tall.
It’s not your responsibility to teach them or help them change their behavior. But it is your responsibility to stay in control, to be professional, and to protect yourself.
When you stand tall, it means you know what they’re doing. When you stand tall, it means it’s not okay to behave that way. When you stand tall, it means you are comfortable describing their behavior to those who can do something about it. When you continue to stand tall, you make it clear there is nothing they can do to prevent you from standing tall.
In the future, they may behave defensively and aggressively with others, but they won’t behave that way with you. And maybe that will help others stand tall.
Image credit — Johan Wieland
It’s not the work, it’s the people.
I used to think the work was most important. Now I think it’s the people you work with.
Hard work is hard, but not when you share it with people you care about.
Struggle is tolerable when you’re elbow-to-elbow with people you trust.
Fear is manageable when you have faith in your crew.
You’re happy to carry an extra load when your friend needs the help.
And your friend is happy to do the same for you.
When you’ve been through the wringer a teammate, they grow into more than a teammate.
If you smile at work, it’s likely because of the people you work with.
And when you’re sad at work, it’s also likely because of to the people.
When you care about each other, things get easier, even when they’re not easy.
Stop what you’re doing and look at the people around you.
What do you see?
Who has helped you? Who has asked for help?
Who has confided in you? To whom have you confided?
Who believes in you? In whom do you believe?
Who are you happy to see? Who are you not?
Who will you miss when they’re gone?
For the most important people, take a minute and write down your shared experiences and what they mean to you.
What would it mean to them if you shared your thoughts and feelings?
Why not take a minute and find out?
Wouldn’t work be more energizing and fun?
If you agree, why not do it? What’s in the way? What’s stopping you?
Why not push through the discomfort and take things to the next level?
Image credit — HLI-Photography
When I’m Asked To Take On New Work
Here are the questions I ask myself when I’m asked to take on new work….
Do I know what the work is all about?
Is it well-defined?
Would it make a big difference if the work is completed successfully?
Would it make a big difference if it’s not?
Is it clear how to judge if the work is completed successfully?
Is the work important and how do I know?
Is it urgent? (The previous question is far more important to me.)
Is there more important work?
Who would benefit from the work and how do I feel about it?
Would I benefit and how do I feel about it?
Am I uniquely qualified or can others do the work?
Am I interested in the work?
Would I grow from the work?
Who would I work for?
Who would I work with?
Would my career progress?
Would I get a raise?
Would I spend more time with my family?
Would I spend more time in meetings?
Would I travel more?
What does my Trust Network think?
Would I have fun? (I think this is a powerful question.)
These aren’t the questions you should ask yourself, but I hope the list helps you develop your own.
Image credit — broombesoom
Swimming In New Soup
You know the space is new when you don’t have the right words to describe the phenomenon.
When there are two opposite sequences of events and you think both are right, you know the space is new.
You know you’re thinking about new things when the harder you try to figure it out the less you know.
You know the space is outside your experience but within your knowledge when you know what to do but you don’t know why.
When you can see the concept in your head but can’t drag it to the whiteboard, you’re swimming in new soup.
When you come back from a walk with a solution to a problem you haven’t yet met, you’re circling new space.
And it’s the same when know what should be but it isn’t – circling new space.
When your old tricks are irrelevant, you’re digging in a new sandbox.
When you come up with a new trick but the audience doesn’t care – new space.
When you know how an experiment will turn out and it turns out you ran an irrational experiment – new space.
When everyone disagrees, the disagreement is a surrogate for the new space.
It’s vital to recognize when you’re swimming in a new space. There is design freedom, new solutions to new problems, growth potential, learning, and excitement. There’s acknowledgment that the old ways won’t cut it. There’s permission to try.
And it’s vital to recognize when you’re squatting in an old space because there’s an acknowledgment that the old ways haven’t cut it. And there’s permission to wander toward a new space.
Image credit — Tambaco The Jaguar
Effectiveness Before Efficiency
Efficient – How do we do more projects with fewer people?
Effective – Let’s choose the right project.
Would you rather do more projects that miss the mark or fewer that excite the customer?
Efficient – How do we finish the project faster?
Effective – Let’s fully staff the project.
Would you rather burn out the project team or deliver on what the customer wants?
Efficient – How do we reduce product cost by 5%?
Effective – Let’s make customers’ lives easier.
Would you rather reduce the cost or delight the customer?
Efficient – How can we go faster?
Effective – Let’s get it right.
Would you rather go fast and break things or get it right for the customer?
Efficient – How many projects can we run in parallel?
Effective – Let’s fully staff the most important projects.
Would you rather get halfway through four projects or complete two?
Efficient – How do we make progress on as many tasks as possible?
Effective – Let’s work on the critical path.
Would you rather work on things that don’t matter or nail the things that do?
Efficient – How can we complete the most tasks?
Effective – Let’s work on the hardest thing first.
Would you rather learn the whole thing won’t work before or after you waste time on the irrelevant?
If there’s a choice between efficiency and effectiveness, I choose effectiveness.
Image credit — Antarctica Bound
How To Elevate The Work
If you want people to work together, give them a reason. Tell them why it’s important to the company and their careers.
If you want people to change things, change how they interact. Eliminate leaders from some, or all, of the meetings. Demand they set the approach. Give them control over their destiny. Make them accountable to themselves. Give them what they ask for.
If you want to create a community, let something bad happen. The right people will step up and the experts will band together around the common cause. And after they put the train back on the track, they’ll be ready and willing for a larger challenge.
If you want the team to make progress, make it easy for them to make progress. Stop the lesser projects so they can focus. Cancel meetings so they can focus. Give them clear guidance so they can focus on the right work. Give them the tools, time, training, and a teacher. Ask them how to make their work easier and listen.
If you want the team to finish projects faster, ask them to focus on effectiveness at the expense of efficiency.
If you want the organization to be more flexible, create the causes and conditions for trust-based relationships to develop. When people work shoulder-to-shoulder on a difficult project trust is created. And for the remainder of their careers, they will help each other. They will help each other despite the formal organizational structure. They will help each other despite their formal commitments. They will help each other despite the official priorities.
If you want things to change, don’t try to change people. Move things out of the way so they can make it happen.
Image credit — frank carman
Universal Truths
When things don’t go as planned, recognize the Universe doesn’t care about your plan.
When the going gets tough, the Universe is telling you something. You just don’t know what it’s telling you.
When in doubt, do the next right thing. That’s how the Universe rolls.
If you don’t like how it’s going, change your situation or change your expectations. Those are the two options sanctioned by the Universe.
If something bad happens, don’t take it personally. The Universe doesn’t know your name.
If you catch yourself taking your plan seriously, don’t. The Universe frowns on seriousness.
Don’t spend time creating a grand plan. The Universe isn’t big on grand plans.
If your plan requires the tide to stay away, make a different one. The Universe never forgets to tell the tide to come in.
If you find yourself chasing the Idealized Future State, stop. The Universe has disdain for the ideal.
If something good happens, don’t take it personally. The Universe doesn’t know your name.
When you don’t know the answer, that’s the Universe telling you you may be onto something.
When you have all the right answers, that’s the Universe telling you you’re not asking the right questions.
Image credit — Giuseppe Donatiello
What do you do when you’ve done it before?
If you’ve done it before, let someone else do it.
If you’ve done it before, teach someone else to do it.
If you’ve done it before, do it in a tenth of the time.
Do it differently just because you can.
Do it backward. That will make you smile.
Do it with your eyes closed. That will make a statement.
Do its natural extension. That could be fun.
Do the opposite. Then do its opposite. You’ll learn more.
Do what they should have asked for. Life is short.
Do what scares them. It’s sure to create new design space.
Do what obsoletes your most profitable offering. Wouldn’t you rather be the one to do it?
Do what scares you. That’s sure to be the most interesting of all.
Image credit — Geoff Henson